I am more out than in with the blog these days it seems. For the first time since right after I started blogging, I am feeling an odd reticence when I sit before the keys. But this time it is not the quandaries over showing my kids' faces, or how much to reveal about our hometown. It has more to do with how much of the real stuff I heap on a platter and bring to the table versus how much I keep here. Not just for myself, but for fuller conversations and deeper relationships that honor the topics with context, time and grace.
I don't want to write here about the political candidate I am supporting this year, though I am a passionate armchair pundit, because I fear a box-- "oh, she is one of those sorts of people!" more or less committed to one thing or another than the reader imagined. A mark of our times, to look for those boxes into which to file each other-- I do it too.
I have a certain impatience toward writing about parenting-- I have not been at the top of my game lately, and I don't mind revealing that-- I just have the misgiving that I should be doing it more and pontificating less. Actually, that speaks to a general impatience I am feeling with myself-- a "just do it!!!" It is lovely, most of the time, to care for our home, so I guess I am in a season of just reveling in it more and reflecting on it less.
Perhaps this blog has had its season for me. I'm not sure. John and I chuckle often over the generation gap we feel between ourselves and some of his younger coworkers. The world online still seems utterly other to us-- we are somewhat crotchety and insecure in it. Real connections are made here and I don't discount them-- the hearts and minds that bless and nurture me pulse and beat in real bodies and real hands convey their thoughts.
But for me, when I feel unsteady, or as though my footing in the here is not what it should be, this world is the first thing to be placed, gently but firmly, on some back burner
Perhaps I will return to this space at some point. Until then I encourage you to seek and find the beauty and grace in every day.
7 comments:
my first blogger-inspiration, i would be most sad to see you go. but i know you've been considering this for quite some time. you are a woman who has seasons of interests, so i'm not surprised. if you choose to leave, i look forward to seeing the next place you place your toes. love you.
pontificating. is it wrong that I love that you used one of my favorite words in this post?
I am feeling all betwixt and between about the world online myself. :)
I will certainly miss your beautiful writing and insights, Missy, but you must do what you feel the Lord is leading you to do. May you be blessed as you follow that path. If you ever return you make sure you drop by and let me know. Bless you. It's been a blessing coming by here for visits in the last year.
Susanne
You truly have been a blessing in my life. Your writing is some of the best and simplest that I've enjoyed reading in the blog world. I know all too well how blogging can invade your life. I'm feeling much happier as I am taking an break. I'm still reading a few blogs where I feel a certain kinship. I've been so emotional about blogging lately that I actually cried a little bit as I read your post. You will be missed.
I'm fairly certain that we aren't supporting the same person for the 2008 election and that is fine with me. One of the greatest lessons I've learned from blogging is that underneath all those labels we are women and mothers trying to do our best for our children and family.
God bless you.
Well then, I'm looking forward to your season of renewed blogging :)
ah, my kindred spirit. I am well-known in my itty blogworld for changing my mind all the time. :) I love it! I hate it! I hate it! I love it!
The way I see it - everything in my real life has to be consistent, faithful, dedicated. Blogging can fall into the moody, if I feel like it, indecisive category. :)
I sure appreciate your spirit and your sharing whenever you do decide to come here.
Hi - just checking in.
If you do decide to return to blogging, just send us the link so we know where to find your lovely words.
Sheri
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